Semi-relevant musings on internet self-portraiture

DIY profile photos are a pretty familiar concept for anyone who has been near Bebo or Facebook. Most people have at least one Facebook friend who is an avid fan of the "flattering-above-angle-self-portrait", or perhaps the "flattering-high-contrast-webcam-photo", or even the "unflattering-low-contrast-low-angle-webcam-photo". Perhaps you are even one of these people. If so, that's cool.

(I totally didn't just alienate you.)

No, but seriously. Pretty much everyone with a camera light enough to hold without dropping it and snapping the lens off has tried it. While many people have this down to a finely honed talent (and are therefore harder to spot, since their photos are so well done it's like someone else actually did take them) there tends to be a signature style for this kind of arms-length photography.

1. The Flattering Above-Angle Pose. This is more popular with newcomers to the DIY profile pic. Turns out taking a photo from an angle so high it's like it was shot from a security camera makes an individual look more attractive. I'd post a link here, but seriously- just look on Bebo. Conveniently, this particular style of photo invites the occurence of Phenomenon 2.

2. The Visible Arm. This is what happens when you hold your phone/camera out at a flattering angle of choice, and the arm holding said device can't quite escape the camera. I mean, if you want a wide enough shot you're going to have to stretch your arm right out, right? You'll usually see The Visible Arm extending up towards the edge of the frame. A lot of people have developed admirable skill at avoiding The Arm (web-cam, tripod, and "balance camera on stack of books" methods certainly help) but you'll also find people who are blissfully unaware of it. And it's totally not embarrassing.

3. The High-Contrast Photo. Similarly to 1, this is more common with younger photo-takers and tends to fade out after they realize they're barely identifiable. The effect can be achieved in a number of ways. With post-processing such as Photoshop, by using a webcam with those fandangled settings that do exciting things, or simply by owning an unrealiable camera. Closely related to the Camera-Flash-Obscures-My-Face-In-Mirror self portrait.

Why do people take these kinds of photos of themselves? The kind I'm talking about in particular are the ones so unrealistic it's fascinating. Surely if you have any real-life contacts then people will know what you really look like, thus rendering your carefully arranged amateur modelling photos somewhat pointless. I don't mean to bash people who take photos of themselves- I mean, everyone with a camera has tried the arms-length photo before.

But... people seem to have developed an obsession with their online personas.

People want a photo that's going to look good in the thumbnail that's going to be appearing next to every comment they leave. For a lot of people, The Profile has become an aesthetic statement (of the soulllll) where for others it is merely a contact card. The amateur self-portrait is an awesome way to look at people's views of themselves. There's a weird kind of self-consciousness revealed when someone posts a photo so carefully orchestrated as to present his or herself in a particular way. Incidentally, it's interesting to see who posts clearly self-shot photos of themselves, and who refuses to. Some people find it embarassing to post photos where they appear to be consciously presenting themselves as attractive, or hardcore, or whatever.

And remember: just because eHow says it's all good to get professional photos done primarily for your FB profile doesn't mean you should in any way do that. Please. Just stick to DIY.