Something fun to read before the exams Part4

The owner of the Silver medal: Big Rigs- Over the Road Racing

Playing Big Rigs just like somebody, all in sudden, pushes you on the ground, rubs 20 dollars from you, and then before leaving, spits all over you. It is a shame for either the game itself, or the person who play it.

This game, Big Rigs, was developed by a Russian company, called Stellar Stone. On their website, they claim that, this particular game surely can be seen as “the combination of the Russian computer programmers’ intelligence and hard-work. Once it on the market, it will bet all the top racing game.” On the package, they wrote, “Big Rigs contains thousand, not hundred, of free roads, motorways and hikes.” Actually, the thing which really surprises me is, it was sold thousand copies, but I can’t find who bought them, in fact.

Anyway, the biggest features make the game tragic is listed in the following:

1. When you finish the game, I mean after the first race of the first time, and then you want to try again, the moment you enter the game, it says:” YOU ARE WINNER.” If you really, really want to play it once more, then you have to reinstall the whole game again. There is something even more ridiculous. Without quitting the game, right after finishing the first race you want to try the next map (only two maps available), the moment you enter the game, it says:” YOU ARE WINNER.” What the… Yet, he only different between two maps are buildings, but I would call them “the buildings”, because they are just blocks. Somehow, I don’t even think they even qualified to be called “the block”. You know why? Because everything in there are mirages. While playing, you are not only can drive your ride through houses, but as well as mountains.
2. Whoever develops this game, hate Isaac Newton and physics? Please believe me. In its world, the big rigs can go 90 miles per hours toward a 90 degree cliff, and then go straight up, like miracle. Yes, you are not dreaming, so am I. Also, the rigs can go all the way from zero to 60 miles per hours within 5 second, and yet stop instantly with tip of your finger on your keyboard.
3. Back mirror is a steady picture. No matter where you are, the picture never changes a thing, and so is the world, where the sky always is light blue and the land is grey.
4. You think it is weird to have a grey land, well, not if it compares to the A.I of your enemies. In fact, there is no A.I at all. When the competition begins, the enemy doesn’t move an inch. I shit you not. In other words, you are racing in a game you could not possibly lose. And not to mention, same as the buildings, you also can drive through the enemy rig.

Under personal comments: ………….. I can’t say anything to a game like this. Oh, dear god, have mercy to the humanity!

HERE COMES THE GOLD MEDAL WINNER: Blood Lions (1997)

Blood Lion was made by the Chinese in 1997. It was way to classic, even as a tragic in the history of video games. There is also a rumour; it says, “In 2009, based on its great reputation, the CIA tries the game. After 10 minutes, the computer becomes a scrap instantly.”

You can say everything in the game is piece of shit, except the historical background. On its advertising, it says:” In 2010, your hometown, the super nation, People Republic of China has been invaded. Suddenly, blood shadows the clouds, flaming tears the night, and the sound of tanks crashes your dream. At front of M1A1, your tanks are weak as piece of paper. As a man, and a Chinese man, even though the foundations of your country is horrible, however please encourage yourself to join the fearless army and enter the battle for killing your enemies. Protect and save China with all cost.” It all sounds like a wonderful, and everybody is waiting for the moment of buying it. And then when the day arrives…

I really wish the game was published on GBC, or if possible, may be on dishwashing machine, or leaf blow machine, anything but not on the PC. Without mention the ugly picture, the thing that shocks people the most is its mindless AI designing. During battle, there is a chance that, when the solider under fire but he doesn’t return the fire; when you order them to do something, more than 50% your soldiers may just stand there and do nothing; sometime, without doing anything on the soldiers, they just completely act on their own, such as throwing bombs, lying down… The AI of your enemies is equally low.

Under personal comment: This is the longest I can get. Sorry, I just can’t take any more.